365 Grateful: too many hats

365 - 02-18-2015

My friend Jane re-posted a Huffpost blog today: “What Not To Wear After Age 50: The Final Say” by Michelle Combs (“blogger, mother, wife, drinker of tequila”).

Hilarious, of course, but also quite insightful. Among other things, she says, women after 50 shouldn’t wear:

  • The weight of the world
  • Shame and regret
  • Rose-colored glasses

Not a bad list. Not a bad list at all. But what really caught my fancy was the fifth “don’t” on her list: “Too many hats.” Wrapped up in her humor was simple truth. She writes,

When you wear too many hats, it’s easy to forget which hat you’re wearing. For instance, are you wearing the “no nonsense corporate” hat when you meant to wear your “quirky and kicked back” hat?

You know what? That resonated with me. I recognized myself there. I’ve been wearing the “life is all serious and stuff” brand of hats pretty much all the time these days – and I don’t like it. I don’t like it at all, because what I’m missing is the “fun and games” hat. And the really cool “laugh a lot” hat, not to mention my “loosen up and relax into the moment” hat.

I know it’s a holdover from the past year of going through major life stress. (You know what I mean: building a house, trying to sell one, kicking around money, future goals, dealing with less than welcoming people, and other weighty things. You could point out that it harbors a bit of the weight of the world, too, but I’d appreciate if you turned a blind eye toward that piece because I already get it.)

Fact is, I’ve become accustomed to wearing too many of those serious hats and not enough of a variety. When I keep hearing Charlie mention that I didn’t get that he was joking (for the umpteenth time), or I realize (too late), that I’ve gone all analytical when fun would have been a better choice … well, I know I’ve slipped into hat realm.

I don’t want to do that any more. So today, I’m grateful for Ms. Combs’ humorous blog, and her deceptively simple way of drilling down to what’s essential … for women over 50 as well as those who haven’t gotten there yet.

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